The 3-Month Report Card

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It's the last Friday of yet another month, which means I got to wear jeans to work and it's time for yet another progress report!

Since my last report card, here's what we've managed to accomplish:

  • Received my ring (it's beautiful and I want to start wearing it nooooow)
  • Ordered and received Blake's ring
  • Attended my first dress fitting
  • Sent out invitations to the Perth Ceremony
  • Booked a place for me to stay the night before and of the wedding
  • Booked chauffeurs
  • Chose the supplier for our wedding cake
  • Ordered and received my wedding shoes
  • Ordered and received a number of other accessories for my wedding dress
  • Ordered wedding favours (again)
  • Ordered a few other surprises for the wedding day
  • Arranged a pre-wedding photo shoot with our photographer

At this stage in the planning, though, deliverables start popping up. Items we've ordered are coming in now, and a more concrete idea of how things will look on the day slowly solidifies from the murky, misty daydream. The second-guesses begin in earnest, and this means that things start going wrong.

Many of these hiccups will be shared and talked about in their own little blog posts, though, so I'm not 100% keen on sharing them here. What I will say is that there's yet to be a big drama because there's still plenty of time to remedy any issues. It's hard to predict whether or not this will still be the case in a month's time!

The Fedex Emotional Rollercoaster

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Singling Fedex out in this instance is perhaps a bit unfair, because they're far from the only company offering tracking information when a parcel is sent. But they are involved on this particular parcel, plus it keeps the title of the post shorter.

My wedding ring is being mailed to me via Fedex. It took several weeks of searching and calling around and trying things on and whatnot, but in the end it came down to two candidates: a ring in Townsville (QLD) to be made by my good mate Kalina's father versus a ring to be made in the USA where I actually got to choose each individual diamond (more stressful than exciting, as it turns out).

In the end, as I referenced in another post, what made the decision was palladium. I really did want a ring made in palladium and between the two options, that left me with the USA one.

After some to-ing and fro-ing about certain diamonds not being available and getting suitable alternatives and whatnot, I received a shipping notification and tracking information from Fedex late last week.

I have checked the Fedex tracking information at least thrice a day since then, following this tiny shiny thing across the US, through to Singapore, and as of the writing of this post it's currently in Belmont, WA. Guys, I drove through Belmont today, which is rare because I very seldom drive to work.

I PROBABLY DROVE RIGHT PAST MY RING AND DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT.

The status is listed as "In Transit" but it also says "Clearance in Progress". That was at 01:33 this morning and there have been no updates since then. So is it in a truck now and the website just didn't update? DOES THAT MEAN IT'S ON ITS WAY NOW? COULD THERE BE A PROBLEM WITH THE CLEARANCE? WHAT DOES CLEARANCE EVEN MEAN? WHAT IS TAKING SO LONG? WHAT DID I DO WRONG?!

Tracking information is one of those curse-as-blessing things that looks amazing and useful but, for me at least, actually causes an undue amount of stress and over-excitement. What this means is that if I don't get my ring within the next 24 hours, oh my gosh I'm going to be SO UPSET, probably more upset than I would have been had I not known that it's somewhere in Perth right this minute!

That Ring Thing

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This is the ring Blake used to propose:

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Cute, hey. I loved the idea, as did my family. If he hadn't won them over already, he certainly did with this move.

My grandmother is in her late 80s and, bless her heart, her age has been showing in recent years. For as long as I can remember, our clan's matriarch is infamous for a near-pathological obsession with being "proper" and "polite".  When Blake came to Singapore for Christmas in December 2012, my grandmother, in very her-like way, she apologised repeatedly to him for her "very poor English".

(This was the second time he'd met my grandmother; the first time was in September 2009 in Beijing.)

Let me make this perfectly clear: my grandmother speaks grammatically perfect English. She has pulled each of her grandchildren up on grammar errors at some stage or another, including those of us who speak it with native fluency. Her vocabulary and syntax are better than those of ACTUAL native speakers. And it's not her first language, either.

Anyway, she's basically apologising to be polite. It's a saving face thing that prevails in Chinese culture.

My mother recently showed my grandmother the above photo of the ring. Her response? To remark on how gorgeous the ring was, and how there were so many huge diamonds on the ring, and how extravagant it was!

I'm 99% sure this was a combination of failing eyesight as well as the aforementioned exceeding politeness. Either way, Blake finds this story hilarious.

Weird Things We've Encountered 3: Gold

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Those of you who know me well know that when I put my mind to doing something important, I go full-on nerd with it. I research, I read, bug people in the know, research some more, compare research, etc. I take notes. And usually the higher the stakes, the more research goes in, the more notes are taken, the more people are bugged. This not all together unusual human behaviour, but it does lead you down the path of some interesting and unexpected revelations.

While searching for the perfect "ring" (I am not wearing an engagement ring and instead am going to get just one to represent both), I read up on gold and gemstones and all that jazz. As it turns out, Australia jewellers only use 9 carat gold or 18 carat gold. It is impossible to walk into a store in Australia and ask for any other carat gold.

I was befuddled by this standard. 9 carat gold, while harder, is far less durable than 18 carat gold. It's got less gold in the mix, meaning it's scratch resistant, but also tends to tarnish more quickly and trigger higher instances of allergic reactions in people with sensitivities to certain alloys. And while that might not bother some folks, getting it made as an everyday-all-day wedding ring is ill-advised.

By comparison, 18 carat gold is purer, softer, and far more durable. And, because of the higher gold content, it's way more expensive. Just about double the price, as the numbers imply. The result is you either have a very affordable material that's pretty crap for wedding ring wear, or you drop many many dollars on extra good gold. The lack of a "middle" ground confuses me greatly.

I still haven't figured out why this is the Australian industry standard; this does not appear to be information willingly shared with the lay person. Overseas, 14 carat gold is far more common, and is probably the most common material used in wedding rings these days. That's probably because it's pretty in-between hardness and durability, and it's more affordable than the 18 carat stuff.

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Doesn't that drive away people who are happy with 14 carat gold into buying rings from overseas? I mean, what with the internet these days and all, you're not locked into your local market if you really don't want to be! It's definitely an interesting choice, and I wonder what the rationale is for the 9/18 exclusivity here; I'm absolutely sure there is an explanation that makes sense, I just haven't encountered it yet!

If you've got some pro knowledge about why this is the situation in Australia (or if I'm somehow misinformed), I'd love to hear it!