Today (13 October, 2018) is Treat Yourself Day 2018. I’ve also been rewatching all of Parks & Rec in an effort to inject some positivity into my brain while not exposing myself to anything new that may have incidental triggers (fuck you, Netflix’s Next Gen). So, spending the day engaging in shameless retail therapy sounded like a great idea when Blake suggested it.

It took me a while to come up with something I wanted that was an actual “treat” and not something practical. I decided on a new pair of wireless, noise-canceling headphones... I need a pair now with my new audio-jackless phone and to replace my old, ugly-ass wired ones, so now seemed as good a time as any. And, while we were wandering the aisles of that nerdy capitalist temple known as JB Hifi, we decided also to get a Nintendo Switch for Blake. We got a sweet deal on the lot, so that was a nice bonus.

That means that for the first time ever, we own 3/3 mainstream same-generation video game consoles. Plus, these headphones are dooooope (Sony WH-1000XM3 in silver, for those curious).

We also stopped at our local pet store for some things for Bodhi. Can’t leave the good boy out!

Unpacking and setting up all our new stuff was a nice, fun distraction. But at the same time, it feels really weird to divert your grief into consumerism. There’s a twinge of guilt around letting yourself even have a little bit of joy at a time like this, let alone having it be about “things” rather than anything more meaningful. But you know what? Fuck it. Not everything we do or say has to be surrounded by some great meaning. It was admittedly nice having a break from that and just enjoy things because we can.

Plus, gift-giving is one of the 5 love languages, so getting something we each wanted for each other was just another way to communicate our mutual love and support.

It helped that we have money allocated into our Rainy Day Fund (which is separate to our Family Planning budget, I feel I should add), and it was actually raining today. Felt like an all-together appropriate thing to do today.

Of note: Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day is on 15 October. I’m not all together sure how I will feel on that day, but I already have some ideas on how we will observe it meaningfully.